I had a dream the other night about an earthquake. 

I grew up on the fault lines of the San Francisco Bay Area, and from a very early age, made a habit of sleeping through earthquakes. And most people would think that me having earthquake dreams would seem normal for a California girl.

But I don’t normally dream about them. 

I sometimes have prophetic dreams about things, but this one seemed more like an omen in a way. 

The earthquake happened in my dream and I could feel it happening in the dream and in my body. And when I woke up, it felt like my neck was crumbling, like things would crumble in an earthquake. 

I have been having worsening symptoms with my neck lately. So much so I went to the emergency room yet again on Saturday (my fourth trip in four months), and managed to get them to order yet another MRI on my neck (my third in four months). 

But unlike the previous trips, where they told me that I was either “fine”, it was “just arthritis”, “it was probably my anxiety talking”, or I should “probably lose some weight”, a diagnosis actually appeared. 

I actually got a diagnosis on a neck that has been slowly deteriorating for years. I knew in my gut that there was still something wrong, and holy shit, was I right. 

I won’t go into the diagnosis specifics until I get a plan on what I’m doing next, but just getting that diagnosis gave me so much relief. And yes, the earthquake “crumbling” dream actually made sense after the diagnosis because my neck really is crumbling in a way. 

So many people think you’re “crazy” for trusting your intuition, but I have diagnosed myself so many times just going off my gut and what I know about the body. 

I couldn’t sleep the night before and I kept thinking, “I need to go back to the ER that diagnosed my vertebral artery dissection after my accident eight years ago.” And I did. And true to form, I got a diagnosis there yet again. 

The crazy thing about that? I think I got one of the medics and the doctor I had eight years ago because they seemed so familiar to me… 

I’ve said this too many times, but I’ll say it again and again. Trust your gut. It is always right. Fuck the people who think you’re crazy for trusting it. 

And yes, sometimes dreams can mean nothing or can be frivolous. But consistently, they hold a hell of a lot of meaning. So pay attention to what they’re telling you. Look up meanings in a dream book or app. Sometimes they are obvious, but sometimes you need to do a little detective work to figure it out, especially if your mind and subconscious is as active as mine is. 

But thanks to that dream, I got a diagnosis on my neck. And I will always refer to my neck as an earthquake.